Comedy and Humour StoriesNaija Stories

Who Is Kenny?

I don’t think I have ever felt terrible and developed headaches like this all my life. Yesterday will always be a crazy day to remember.

Three months ago, I joined a dating site called ‘Lovers’ Home.’ For the first time in my life, I fell in love with a young man, Kenny by name. He had every quality I needed in a man, and we loved each other more, day by day. In one of our chats, he told me his other names were Tay and Iddy. I became confused and asked him what they meant. He replied that Tay meant ‘Taye,’ while Iddy meant ‘Idowu.’ I was enveloped in worries, because I was sure the names were for triplets in Yoruba land. Anyway, at a point, I had to put that aside because of his love which had gone under my skin.

We had planned to meet at one of the eateries close to his house on Valentine’s day, but just a few hours to the day of meeting, I changed the venue; I told him I was going to come to his place instead. Kenny tried to stop me from coming to place, insisting it wasn’t proper for me as a lady to come to his first. I stood my ground and he agreed to my proposal.

It was Valentine’s day already, I took my bath, dressed up in my newly-bought red gown, clipped my hair with a red hairpin and wore my red high heeled shoes. I picked up my red purse, stared at my reflection in the mirror, smiled and winked. I looked so sweet and was set to go.

When I got to the gate of his house, I knocked on it. My God, I gaped when I saw Kenny. He was on a white shirt and a red three-quater trousers. He looked even more handsome with his afro haircut. He hugged me and cupped my hand with his, as he walked me to his house.

As he was about to open the door, someone else did from inside. My lips parted in shock. What I saw made my purse fall from my hand. I had just seen Kenny’s look-alike—the same hairstyle, complexion, name them. Before I could gather words to say, I heard another say ‘Hi’ from behind me. I shivered, shock gripped me because they were on the same color of clothes; he looked exactly like them. I gazed at the three of them, and the next thing was that they started arguing.

One said, “Shut up, she’s mine.”

Another said, “You must be stupid, I own her.”

The third said, “Stop it. You know she is mine!”

I didn’t have to think twice; I picked up my purse and quickly ran outside. I fell as I was about to cross the road then passed out. I have just woken up in the hospital, and all I heard from the doctor is that three men are downstairs waiting for me.

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