Folake seemed to have woken up on the wrong side of the bed that morning as her mouth felt sour. Sitting at the edge of the bed drenched in sweat, her eyes were red and rheumy. Her face was drained of colour and animation. Her hollow eyes bulged out of her sockets swollen and cloudy. Tears rolled her cheeks majestically. She rested her mentum on her palm which sat tight on her lap. She got up and paced round the room tugging at her locks.
“I’ve gotten to the height of this,” she said in sotto-voce.
The verandah was windy, a soft wind laced the blue curtains against the stool standing in front of the coffee table.
She sat in front of the mirror using her index finger and thumb to feel the texture of her breast. Her breasts looked bloated with her nipples which looked like an inverted commas.
“It’s two months after Christmas and I’ve not heard pim from Alex.”
She picked her doctors report with a gathering frisson. Her eyes pictured the HIV POSITIVE italicized and her tears flowed more.
She felt empty and motionless, her mouth agape and hands on the head. “He said I still have a chance to live, what’s the point of living? My child will have no father and growing up with a mother that will die in no time. What’s the point?” she kept asking herself.
The Christmas eve incidence had refused to let go of her. The picture of Alex had taken a space inside of her. She couldn’t let go of those ugly memories of him.
“No wonder they say that the most evil appeared like the most innocent. His pink lips that looked as if he wore lipsticks, his oval face and high cheekbones. His little eyes that looked like holes that were punctured open, his broad shoulders and wide chest made me to visualize myself sinking into his arms. He spoke softly, choosing his words carefully and perfectly. Riding with him in his SUV was like a dream come true. We sang the lines of Ifunanya by Psquare together.
“He called me his first lady, I was wearing his ring already. Everything moved so fast and smoothly. We lodged into Top Rank Hotels; we had our hors d’oeuvre at CELEBRITES before moving into ROBAN STORES to shop. I shook the inner round parts of me deliberately. Thoughts of having a baby with Alex enveloped my mind. I couldn’t let go of him. I would swallow him full, I would lock his heart with the key of my love for no other monster of glamour to lay her hands on him.
“While on the the bed, things unfolded faster than I had envisioned. We started kissing, I sank into his arms he smelled of eau de cologne. I found solace in his chest.
“I met an empty room the next morning. I tried his number severally but it didn’t go through. I blamed it on network hiccups. It’s two months now and I’m yet to feel a sign of him. I can’t take this anymore. What will my parents say and what will my friends think of me?” she asked several questions to an empty room before she picked up the kitchen knife ready to kill herself never to rise whole.
BE THE LADY YOU’D LIKE YOUR DAUGHTER TO BE.