Locking Her Heart (Part 18)

Continued from the last part…

Alicia’s POV

I sat there speechless for what seemed like hours, but I guess it was just some seconds, waiting for him to continue.

“Like I said before, it was my fault yes I admit that. It’s my fault I didn’t ask her about anything before saying those harsh words to her, it’s my fault for even accepting the bet in the first place but you need to believe me, Alicia, I swear I never meant for any of this to happen,” he said. “I saw Michelle as the girl who was unnoticed by any one and yet she didn’t give a damn. She carried herself with poise and acted like she didn’t care about the fame and that attracted me to her for some strange reason. Josh was the first to notice this so he made fun of me because I usually said I would never fall for a girl. Usually, I would say I was gonna be a player till forever, I could never imagine any girl would tame me anytime soon.

“Later on, Jason got to know about it but I was too proud to admit it so I denied it on all counts, he kept on teasing me and it was seriously getting out of hand, so I told him we should make a bet, If I could her date her for two weeks without falling head over heels in love with her, he would be my slave for a week but if I could not, I would be his slave. At first, he didn’t want to agree but I mocked him and said that he was too chicken-hearted to accept so later on, he agreed and we made the bet. I could not go on because barely a week later, I was already addicted to her, I could barely stay an hour without her so I called off the bet with Jason but he said something shocking. He explained that he just wanted to prove to me that I was already In love with her but I would have to buy him lunch for a weekk though.”

My thoughts were in a turmoil now. If the bet was called off, why would he tell Michelle he made a bet on her? and if they both agreed he loved her then why did he say those harsh words in front of everyone? why did he break her whole being and left her to pick up the pieces? As if he could read my thoughts, he spoke up.

“You’re probably wondering why I did what I did then,” he said.

“Well, yeah. If your relationship was going great, why did you hurt her in that way?” I asked, my voice neutral.

“Well, a few days later I started receiving text messages,” he said.

“What kind of text messages?” I asked.

“Well…”

He was interrupted by the teacher who ordered us to get seated In a commanding tone, he was supposedly the Ethics teacher, right? so why was he so angry?

“We’ll continue this later, you don’t want to upset Mr. Jake, trust me he can be pretty annoying when he wants to be,” Jack said.

“Mr. Jack, would you keep quiet or would you prefer detention after school?” the teacher barked.

That shut Jack up immediately. As we listened to the lesson, part of which I paid little attention to, my mind wandered. A few minutes later, I felt a note under my hand.

‘Let’s meet up in the school garden during recess, I need to clear a lot up.
Jack.’

Once again, I was confused on what to do. I was supposed to meet up with Matt to clear things up, but now I also need to meet up with Jack. What do I do now? If I don’t meet up with Matt, he’ll surely get angry at me and he’s sure been a good friend. I’ll meet up with Jack after school but for now, Matt is of utmost priority.

‘Sorry Jack, I have something really important to do during recess. Why don’t we meet after school’s over?
Alicia.’

I replied to the note and he gave me confused look, probably wondering what I could possibly want to do, but nevertheless, this was also as important. I needed to speak with Matt urgently, he seemed really really angry.

***************

Immediately the bell went, I didn’t waste two seconds more as I exited the class hurriedly as Matt would probably be in the school garden or at least, I hope if he’s not there, I would have to look for him because I can’t let his thoughts go wild.

Walking through the hall en route to the garden, I got pulled back and once more, a hand over my lips prevented me from screaming like I would have done.

“It’s just me, babe, your Prince Charming,” Jason said.

To think my day was going great. Somehow, we hadn’t run into each other throughout the day and I was sincerely thankful for that, but the jerk in him just couldn’t stay away.

“What the hell do you want, Jason? and why do you keep hijacking me into closets? Do you seriously wanna add crazy to your list of stupid qualities?” I asked angrily. “Who in hell even gave you to right to tell Matt we were living together do you have any idea what you’ve done?”

“One, yes, I do. I claimed what’s mine, he needs to know where his limits lies. And two, I didn’t see your throughout the day and I seriously fucking missed you,” he said.

My breath hitched at his statement. I opened my mouth to say something, probably a sassy comeback but nothing came out.

“Glad I made you speechless, babe. I absolutely love it when I do that,” he said winking. “Oh and next time we don’t see each for almost the whole day, trust me, you’ll get hijacked, babe,” he said.

It wasn’t until I heard a door open and close that I snapped out of my trance and I remembered what I was supposed to be doing rather then getting locked in closets with that jerk. But come think of this, maybe Matt was right and I was just another conquest to him, maybe it’s because I act so feisty and maybe it’s because I’m playing hard to get, probably that’s what’s keeping him interested in me because it’s nearly impossible that the school’s bad boy would like someone like me.

**************

Getting to the garden, I met Matt admiring some flowers and looking seriously down. I felt a pang in my chest because I feared this was all my fault. Getting closer to him, I sat close to him and simply stared at him while he admired the flowers. “They are beautiful,” I started.

“You don’t have to be here because you feel pity for me. You can go now,” he said, still not taking a glance at me.

“I’m here to explain, Matt. Jason should not have said it out in the open like that, I promise I was gonna tell you but I guess I never found the right time,” I said.

“The right time, Alicia! You could have told me any time you wanted but no, you decided to keep it a secret from me and I had to find out from him,” he said.

“What was I supposed to say, huh? My parents died and I had no choice but to live with them and I didn’t want anyone to feel an atom of pity for me, that’s the only reason I kept it away from you. I swear, Matt, I really don’t want to lose your friendship, it’s important,” I said with pleading eyes.

“Friendship, Alicia, I’m seriously wondering how you don’t see it yet. You said yes to Sebastian when you barely know him,” he said.

“It was a friendly gesture and everyone will be there so I really see no problem. Matt, you’re making a big fuss over absolutely nothing,” I said my voice now raising a bit.

“It’s not nothing, Alicia, why don’t you see that it’s making me really mad and angry? why don’t you see that I can’t help myself? why don’t you see that it kills me when you do the things you do to hurt me? why don’t you see, Alicia? seriously why don’t you see that I LOVE YOU?” he screamed at me.

***************

After a moment, he seemed to regain his composure, then he said more gently, “I love you, yes Alicia, I love everything about you, your feistiness, your courage. I love the fact that you don’t care about that fact that the school hottie wants to claim you, you don’t care which is why I really don’t want you to get hurt, Alicia. I value our friendship too much to let that happen, I guess that’s why I overreacted. I should not have spoken the way I did; in fact I’ll apologize to Seb, you can go with whom ever you wish to go with, after all, it’s your first party in Richmond. I really don’t wanna jink it for you,” he said with a smile.

Whew! For a second there, I thought he actually meant he loved me, like more than a friend but that would be really impossible. Matt is just a very good friend and he couldn’t possibly see me any other way. I’m just thinking too much about this, but what did he mean when he said how come I don’t see it? “Matt, what don’t I see?” I asked, curious.

“I wondering how you don’t see that to Jason, you’re a mere conquest, the only one who keeps playing hard to get and that’s keeping him so interested in you. Otherwise, he would surely do what he does to all the girls here, use them and once he’s done, dispose them like yesterday’s trash,” he said.

Well that really hurt. Could I really just be a conquest to Jason? There may be an element of truth to what he’s saying, I mean, he did something similar when we were younger and that made me hate him. Come to think of it, I still hate him, so I care less what he thinks of me, I was a fool to believe that maybe he could actually care for me and I let myself be driven by senseless emotions when the glaring fact was that Jason Zac was incapable of love. He proved that to me a long time ago.

“Alicia, I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings that way, you just need to know the truth. Jason isn’t good for you, all he’ll do is cause trouble,” he said.

“Oh and you’re good for her,” Jason said.

I turned to see Jason glaring furiously at the both of us. OMG, did he follow me here? I’m in no mood to talk to him right now, he can go find another conquest or something but definitely not me I don’t have time for this. Taking Matt by the hand, I made to leave when he stopped us both and made me face him staring into his eyes.

For a moment, I thought I saw sadness pass through them, but as quickly as it came, it was replaced with immense anger.

“You’ll rather go with him,” he said, his voice hinting despair.

“And what makes you think I’ll go with you, huh? I told you to stay the hell away from me Jason, I get the fact you love the chase, you love it when girls play hard to get so you could feel good about yourself when they finally submit to you, right? Haven’t you had enough? Are you seriously not tired? Get that fact in your head, I would never, no matter what, never even think of falling for you so sincerely, you’re just wasting your time. Let’s go, Matt,” I said pulling Matt alone.

“Alicia, wait,” he said, his voice dangerously low.

“Didn’t you hear her say she doesn’t want to talk to you? why do you keep on doing this? Jason just stop, Matt said.

“I don’t recall asking your opinion, this is between Alicia and I, so you shouldn’t even be here,” Jason said.

“Matt, let’s just go, it’s not worth it, he’s not worth it. He’ll never change, he’ll always be the same Jason who broke me when we were still little,” I said my voice threatening to break.

“What did you say?” Jason asked.

Grabbing Matt by the hand I left his questions unanswered and made to leave. At least anywhere else would better than beign here with him. I tried to control myself, at least not to look back, but my emotions got the better of me and I turned back a bit but what I saw broke me even further, Jason Zac was sitting on the bench and his eyes looked like tears were threatening to spill any moment. I could barely control myself not to run into his arms and hug him tightly but I can’t, that’ll just make him think he could conquer me more, this is all part of his plan to get me and I’m not going to fall for it not again. Looking forward and acting like I didn’t just see Jason almost breaking down, I left the garden with Matt.

**************

Matt’s POV

For a second there, I almost blew it. I almost admitted that I love Alicia more than anything. Yes, I know for a fact I love her. It wasn’t that difficult to make her think Jason didn’t love her, his reputation preceeds him and besides he only wants to conquer her and to prove once more that no girl could say no to him. Normally, I’d watch from the sidelines but this time, it so different. This time, I fell in love with her and I can’t let that happen, so I’m gonna fight even if I have to play dirty, I’ll do whatever it takes to make her mine.

Her hands felt so warm and smooth against mine but my palm went cold immediately she disengaged them. It really looked like she was affected by what happened earlier, but I wouldn’t worry too much, I’ll make sure I erase every thought of Jason from her mind, that I promise her. The bell went.

“I’ll see you later, Matt, I guess recess is over. I need to get to English,” Alicia said.

Smiling sweetly at her, I nodded my head signifying that I’ll see her later. Making my way to class, my thoughts were filled on how I would get Alicia to fall hard for me and despise the name Jason or anything that has to do with it.

**************

Alicia’s POV

To say I was feeling bad at the moment was an understatement. I felt immense pain, I felt like running back to him and hugging him to tell him it’s alright that I’m here for him and I’ll never leave him again. I won’t deny that I was attracted to Jason, but I won’t make a fool of myself for him. Matt was right, he’s a player and even Michelle said so herself, I can’t be the one to take him, it should be Scarlett. I mean he did kiss her so maybe he likes her a lot. So I’m not gonna let myself feel bad for someone who obviously doesn’t deserve my sympathy or pity. Twisting the knob of the class door, I made my way inside and took a seat near Michelle and we discussed about random things while waiting for the teacher.

“You okay, Alicia? You seem down, anything you wanna tell me?” Michelle asked.

“Down? Why would I be? Of course not, I guess am just tired that’s all,” I said. “If there someone who should be talking, it’s you what’s the deal between you and Brian,” I said attempting to change the topic.

“Well, like I was gonna tell you earlier…”

She was interrupted when the door opened and we both turned to see who it was. My heart was torn into shreds when he walked in, he looked like the walking dead, like he was tired of living. I dared to look at his eyes and they were not the sparkling ocean blue eyes I’ve grown to notice over these few days, rather they were emotionless and looked like he was in despair he said nothing but sat down quietly.

“Is Jason okay or did something happen? he looks terrible,” Michelle said.

I could not even reply her as all I did was stare at him while he looked on into thin air.

**************

The lecture ended and it was seriously strange. Jason didn’t say a word to anyone nor move an inch but was out the door immediately the bell was rung.

I silently prayed school would be over soon as I had a banging headache. But on second thoughts, it would mean I would have to be alone with him, though I highly doubt he’ll ever talk to me after what happened. Strangely, the mere thought of him not talking to me brought me immense pain.

Classes went past me and I tried as much as I could to pay attention though my thoughts were clouded. I jumped up in fright when the bell was rung as I was in deep thoughts.

My feet stayed glued to the floor as I couldn’t imagine what to do at this moment. Everyone was leaving, probably elated that classes were finally over, while I thought of how I could possibly remain the same house with Jason, but I knew I had no option as it was the only way so I made my way to the school gate but not before bading Michelle and Matt goodbye as well as Anna though Brian was absent. I finalised the plans with Seb on the party tomorrow though if it was up to me, I would not even think of going to that party but I can’t let Seb down. Taking one last glance at the halls and getting my things from the locker, I exited the school building but I once more got pulled by someone with a hand over my mouth to prevent me from speaking and there only one person I know who could do this.

And there he was, hovering over me staring back at me with eyes that were just unreadable like he was trying to tell me something through them, but I did nothing except to stare back silently begging that this would end soon.

“You said you’ll rather go with him, why?” He said his voice getting lower.

I said nothing but stared back as it seemed my breathing had accelerated and I could neither say nor do anything except to stare back.

“Answer me, Alicia. Please just answer,” he pleaded.

Still I said nothing.

“You know what, don’t answer it. You said something, right? That you won’t even think of falling for me but guess what, Alicia, when I’m done with you, you won’t have to think of it because you would have fallen so hard for me I’ll be your addiction,” he said, determined before spinning around to leave.
“Oh and one last thing, I never back down from a fight. You might think you’re just a conquest to me but it’s much more than that. I want you Alicia that’s all I can say, you’re making me go crazy, you’re all I can think of lately and guess what? When I want something I take it, and if anyone tries to get it from me, I don’t stop till I take it back, babe,” he said smirking before finally leaving me to my racing heart.

Read Part Nineteen.

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