“Jude!…get me a small brush!” Dave sighed as he called his assistant. Since he got to his studio, he’s been working on a particular portrait. One of his customers had given him the job to make him a portrait of a market with busy buyers and sellers and different people walking around that market.
“Uhmm… boss…which of the small brushes?The light-brown one or the dark-brown one?” Jude asked.
“Nku-nku-nku!” Dave shook his head negatively. “Jude, are you sure you are alright?” Dave asked.
“Yes boss.” Jude nodded affirmatively.
“I doubt it!” Dave looked at him irritated l’y. “I told you to get me a small brush and you’re asking me a senseless question,” Dave sighed.
“Ah,boss…it’s not really senseless…there are two small brushes and I asked if to bring the light one or dark one,” Jude replied.
“You are very sick!” Dave replied exasperatedly.
“OK Boss.” Jude scratched his head.
Dave stood up from the three-legged long stool he was sitting on, and walked into the store to pick a small brush. After taking the brush, he alighted from the room.
“Owww,” Jude chuckled. “Boss,you should have told me you its the dark-brown brush you wanted,” he added.
Dave stood still for a minute, looking at him in exasperation. ‘This guy is sick,’ he thought.
Dave shook his head and headed for the stool he was sitting on before proceeding with what he was doing.
After working on the portrait for thirty minutes, Dave decided to take a break. Considering the fact that he was already very famished, he decided to send Jude to the restaurant near his studio to get him food.
“Jude!” Dave called,getting down from the stool and stretching his body before turning.
Dave turned only to find Jude sleeping on the only available sofa in the studio, lying like a log of wood with his mouth left wide open.
Dave stood looking at him with his hands akimbo.
‘This guy is indeed very sick,’ he thought.
Then an idea struck Dave. He took the satchet water lying against the wall and walked towards Jude whose mouth was still open. Dave tore the satchet water and poured water into Jude’s mouth till he woke up.
“Cough-cough-cough,” Jude coughed,waking up. After he opened his eyes, he sat and coughed really hard because the water had entered his nostrils. After coughing to his satisfaction, he raised his head and saw his boss right in front of him, looking at him.
“Ah, boss,” he called.
“Huh?” Dave replied him.
“Did a thief break in?” Jude asked in bewilderment.
“Nah.” Dave twiched his lips.
“Ha, but someone tried to kill me!” Jude looked bewildered.
“I gagged you.” Dave smirked.
“Ah boss…I almost died!” Jude exclaimed.
“Your living is useless!” Dave yelled.
“Ah…boss, you would have gone to jail o.” Jude looked astonished. “I even almost died I went to heaven and I saw Angel Gabriel at the gate of heaven,” Jude added.
“You saw Angel Gabriel?” Dave furrowed his right brow.
“Yes. When I got there, he asked me what I was looking for and I said ‘I want to enter the kingdom of God’. He then said ‘Go back, it’s not yet your time!’ Then I turned back and woke up,” Jude ranted.
“Let me tell you something. When you die, you’ll never see Angel Gabriel!” Dave looked at him disgustedly.
“Ah…boss why?” Jude asked bewildered.
“Because, you’re going to HELL FIRE!” Dave smirked.
“Ah, God forbid!” Jude frowned.
“Oh, ok… that’s your problem…..I need you to get me a plate of jollof rice.” Dave sat on the sofa and sighed.
“Jollof rice?” Jude furrowed his brows.
“Yep!…Buy me a plate with plantain and a chicken lap. And also table water, which means bottled water,” Dave clarified.
“Boss I know what table water is,” Jude chuckled.
“Ah, we never can tell, because you can be very stupid at times,” Dave scoffed. “Take.” Dave brought out two thousand naira from his wallet and handed it to Jude. “Please don’t lose my money!” Dave warned him, pulling his left ear with his left thumb and index finger.
“Yes Boss!” Jude saluted him. He stood up and made to go out of the studio when he turned back, standing before Dave. “Boss?” he called.
“What?” Dave asked.
“Ermm, what about me?” Jude asked, scratching his head.
“What about you how?” Dave furrowed his brows.
“Ermm…I..mean…my…jo..llof..rice,” Jude stuttered, looking at the floor.
“Use the salary you collected last week to buy yours.” Dave twiched his lips.
“Ermm…I…ermm…” Jude stuttered, looking around the floor like he was searching for something.
“Ermm you…erm erm…nku nku nku.” Dave shook his head.
“Infact, get lost!…Idiot!” Dave sighed.
With that, Jude disappeared from Dave’s presence.
“Can you imagine?” Dave murmured to himself.